I had been through many things lately. Stress comes from many parties….
First from my mom;
Let study some history now. For those who had already known me, you all know what happened to my family. My mom is alone; my father left her 13 years ago. Alright let’s not get into that, but what I want to say here is that. I never leave her ever since I was born. My sister and brother; they were working oversea all this while, just got back to KL 2 years ago. As such, I am the one who act as my mom’s company all this while.
She wishes she could get my attention, and I tried to give the best I can. When I am not attached, she looks happier. As I always bring her out for dinner and shopping during weekends. Then again, it doesn’t mean I don’t bring after I had attached to someone…. Pls don’t get me wrong here. She just doesn’t want to let other to share my time or so to speak, my attention. Get what I mean now?? Even though I still bring her out during weekends, she is actually frightening whether she will be left out by her daughter – me. What can I do on this?? What she is expecting me to do? Dumb Jason and stay with her forever?
Let me tell you guys my weekday schedule;
Mon – i will send my mom out for physiotherapy at 7.30pm
Tue - my routine gym session with my friends.
Wed - my routine aerobic session
Thurs – might be going out with Jason / stay at home depends on our tiredness
Fri - my mom second physio session
Sat – hiking with my colleagues (might or might not be)
Sat night – dating day with Jason
Sun – Send my mom to market for marketing, if I failed to do so, she will pull her face long (very long indeed, as if I had done something very offensive)
As you all can see here, I am not so attached to anyone here. I separated my time equally to every parties, just that she can’t understand and being selfish. If I stay at home everyday, bring her out on every weekends, she turns to become happier and smile a lot.
I don’t know what I can do to make her feel happier, because she is always NOT happy.
I am stressful because I thought I am behaving like a good daughter, but to her, of all I had done; she will never satisfy. I ever thought, she really wants me to stay at home and company her for the rest of her life?? Is that the only way to make her happy? If that is the case, I had to apologize as this will never happened. I want to have my own life too. She needs to put herself into my shoes. How could she expects everyone to understand her situation and she doesnt care of others? And we did - all of us did, and at the end of day, she is being pampered by us and now what?? She is being so selfish, childish and unreasonable.
I always educate my boy friend to act sanely, be polite and don’t stay up late so that my mom will not HATE him for bringing her daughter out for too late. (It happened in my past relationship) She doesn’t say any negative comments about Jason so far, but as for my experience, she is actually hoping I don’t go out so often with him so that she can have me. She just acts like a jealous mother you know? I am so upset why on earth she is being so childish? I had contributed all I could to the family and I don’t know what else she wants from me.
My relationship with Jason’s family is getting closer now. This is indeed very good news, isn’t it?? She seems like not very happy or I should put it this way, not sharing my happiness. I don’t know what to say. Don’t get me wrong, she NEVER complain about anyone, she just can’t accept that someone else get my attention. Other words, she wants my 100% attention. “So sorry mom, I can’t provide what you seek and you must accept the fact.”
From work;
Well I am not going to talk about my work but just 1 statement – I hope I can have 2 brains + 2 pair of hands.
Conclusion;
I am not happy.
First from my mom;
Let study some history now. For those who had already known me, you all know what happened to my family. My mom is alone; my father left her 13 years ago. Alright let’s not get into that, but what I want to say here is that. I never leave her ever since I was born. My sister and brother; they were working oversea all this while, just got back to KL 2 years ago. As such, I am the one who act as my mom’s company all this while.
She wishes she could get my attention, and I tried to give the best I can. When I am not attached, she looks happier. As I always bring her out for dinner and shopping during weekends. Then again, it doesn’t mean I don’t bring after I had attached to someone…. Pls don’t get me wrong here. She just doesn’t want to let other to share my time or so to speak, my attention. Get what I mean now?? Even though I still bring her out during weekends, she is actually frightening whether she will be left out by her daughter – me. What can I do on this?? What she is expecting me to do? Dumb Jason and stay with her forever?
Let me tell you guys my weekday schedule;
Mon – i will send my mom out for physiotherapy at 7.30pm
Tue - my routine gym session with my friends.
Wed - my routine aerobic session
Thurs – might be going out with Jason / stay at home depends on our tiredness
Fri - my mom second physio session
Sat – hiking with my colleagues (might or might not be)
Sat night – dating day with Jason
Sun – Send my mom to market for marketing, if I failed to do so, she will pull her face long (very long indeed, as if I had done something very offensive)
As you all can see here, I am not so attached to anyone here. I separated my time equally to every parties, just that she can’t understand and being selfish. If I stay at home everyday, bring her out on every weekends, she turns to become happier and smile a lot.
I don’t know what I can do to make her feel happier, because she is always NOT happy.
I am stressful because I thought I am behaving like a good daughter, but to her, of all I had done; she will never satisfy. I ever thought, she really wants me to stay at home and company her for the rest of her life?? Is that the only way to make her happy? If that is the case, I had to apologize as this will never happened. I want to have my own life too. She needs to put herself into my shoes. How could she expects everyone to understand her situation and she doesnt care of others? And we did - all of us did, and at the end of day, she is being pampered by us and now what?? She is being so selfish, childish and unreasonable.
I always educate my boy friend to act sanely, be polite and don’t stay up late so that my mom will not HATE him for bringing her daughter out for too late. (It happened in my past relationship) She doesn’t say any negative comments about Jason so far, but as for my experience, she is actually hoping I don’t go out so often with him so that she can have me. She just acts like a jealous mother you know? I am so upset why on earth she is being so childish? I had contributed all I could to the family and I don’t know what else she wants from me.
My relationship with Jason’s family is getting closer now. This is indeed very good news, isn’t it?? She seems like not very happy or I should put it this way, not sharing my happiness. I don’t know what to say. Don’t get me wrong, she NEVER complain about anyone, she just can’t accept that someone else get my attention. Other words, she wants my 100% attention. “So sorry mom, I can’t provide what you seek and you must accept the fact.”
From work;
Well I am not going to talk about my work but just 1 statement – I hope I can have 2 brains + 2 pair of hands.
Conclusion;
I am not happy.
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